Responding to disclosures

We’ve been doing a lot of work around disclosures over the last few weeks. A range of different clients are needing advice or training around how to respond to staff, clients or members who are in distress.

Everyone’s biggest fear is making a situation worse by saying the wrong thing.

At Fearless Fox, we have the general rule that if you are reacting like a generally good human being, it’s probably going to be ok. Maybe not perfect, but overall, pretty good. There are always things we can learn and things we can do better, but it is unlikely you will do more harm if you are responding to others as you would like to be treated.

The two key disclosures people I train tell me they worry about the most are suicidal thoughts and sexual violence. They don’t fear hearing difficult details, but they worry that if they don’t react the right way that the outcomes could be dire.

It’s natural to worry, but the very fact that you are worrying and wanting to help, shows you are caring and empathetic. They would be two qualities high on our list for being a good human.

Listen to what they are saying.

Believe what has happened.

Don’t judge anything about the situation.

Give them control of decisions.

Offer to help them get the appropriate professional help.

None of these behaviors are difficult. Once we break it down and talk through it with clients they realise how many of these behaviors are already natural to them.

At the base of it, effectively responding in the moment to a disclosure of sexual harassment in the workplace, or a relative opening up about feeling suicidal, or any other difficult thing someone is going through, comes back to The Good Human Rule.

By Isabel Fox